You can’t be a man, in skinny jeans.
The word “sexual” has many different prefixes: Hetero-, Bi-, Homo-, Metro-, etc. Having homosexual family members, and being in the Infantry (Lots of gayness) I’m not disillusioned to the fact that these things exist all around me and throughout society today. My intent is for there to be some black and white here, a proverbial ‘line in the sand.’
When people start trying to cross these lines and meld different aspects of each form of sexuality into a personal identity I start to have issues and would like to offer some clarity for these individuals…
Skinny Jeans were made for: Hetero, homo, or bisexual women; or homo, or bisexual men. Skinny jeans were made to extenuate the natural curves of a woman’s body, highlighting the <insert politically correct word for ‘ass’>. When worn buy a man it does the same thing, and puts out an alert to all the people who have an interest in your <insert politically correct word for ‘ass’>.
If you don’t want me to refer to you as a hetero, homo, or bisexual women, or homo, or bisexual man then I recommend not wearing those damn skinny jeans.
Also, Levis regular fit jeans (not relaxed fit as most of today’s non-skinny jeans are) are perfectly acceptable. They were designed in a simpler time, when men were men and women liked them to be handy, broad-shouldered, strong, and all around bad-ass. I rock a pair of Levis 527 Low, Boot Cut jeans as my favorite pair. They have a regular fit and are worn out just the way I like ‘em. I wear them when I work on the ‘Vette, or when I’m taking Lis out to dinner. They go anywhere and are ready for anything, like jeans are supposed to.
Bottom line: If you’re paying > $50 for a pair of jeans, you’re 1. getting ripped off, and 2. probably in love with a man.
That is all.
staff