What a Girl Wants, 41-60
Today’s 20 have been the easiest for me to dissect. I would like to say that if you’re reading this, you’re learning about me and my inner most thoughts; It’s nice to meet you.
41. Is social, not too shy. Being outgoing comes natural to some, and it seems un-natural to others. If you’re a hermit, find another hermit; hopefully neither of you get crabs… If you want to come out of your shell and be more social, start off with comfortable situations. Go places that offer a chance for you to show your knowledge. If you spend all your time online playing fantasy baseball, go to a sports bar. The people there are all watching games that you have knowledge about. So if there’s a point where you’re engaged in conversation, you can go with facts that you’ve already committed to knowledge; you don’t have to feel the pressure of giving out opinions to random people.
42. Is forgiving. Everyone makes mistakes. The best way to judge a person’s character is to see what they do once those mistakes have been made. Give your significant other the opportunity to make amends — if you still feel like they haven’t made up for their wrongdoing, then make it clear to them that you feel like they’ve learned nothing and will more than likely repeat the action. Don’t forgive someone for a habitual or pathological act. If you get cheated on, and you manage to forgive them for it, make your position clear. Let them know that you’re not looking back if it happens again. Sometimes, to love yourself, you have to realize that a person just isn’t good for you.
43. Will listen when I rant. Girls like to vent — it helps them gain perspective. Don’t ask me how. Be an active listener, but avoid making ANY comments until the end. Even when you do put in your two cents, don’t criticize; just support facts. If she ACTUALLY wants your opinion, she’ll ask for it directly.
44. Willing & ready to stand up for me (even if he doesn’t always totally agree w/me). Unfortunately, chivalry is dead. Too often I see a woman being disrespected and all the men in the area stand idly by and watch. Even if you don’t know her, when you see a woman in need, it’s easy to be the knight in shining armor. Even if you fail, she’ll still see that you tried, which, to a woman (all the other men will still call you a failure… but you’re not gay so they don’t matter) means the same thing.
45. Will let me stand up for him too! My wife, being of the Latin persuasion, could easily handle herself in a fight if she felt passionately about the issue. If I were in need of help, I know that if I let her, my wife is more than willing to be by my side! It’s never not manly to have a bad-ass chick as a partner.
46. Will watch some of my girly tv shows & movies w/me. If you can’t stand an emotional (girly) tv show or movie, apply what I like to call the “Chinese Food” method. I’m allergic to MSG, a common chemical found in Chinese food. Because I love the taste so much, I’ll gladly eat the food and spend the subsequent hour on the porcelain throne. Because you like this girl so much, sit down and watch; find some way to relate to it. Then when you’re done, go do something manly to flush out all the girly thoughts and ideas floating around in your system.
47. Will run to the store for me if I run out of girly products. If you’re called upon to purchase girly products, that means that she likes you enough to let you see her at her worst. Go to the store. Buy yourself something that will cover the girly products in the cart. Pick her up some comfort food and surprise her with it. If you think the girl you’re with might not be the one, go to the checkout counter that has the hottest girl. When she scans the girly products say something like, “It’s going to be hard to break up with her while she’s on her period.. Hopefully she’ll understand that it’s better for both of us.” (Make sure to look sad about it.) If you DO want to stay in your relationship, AVOID THE CHECKOUT LINE WITH THE HOT CASHIER.
48. Has good morals. Read the texts that apply to your faith. If you don’t believe in God or any form of God, I suggest reading them anyway. I’ve recently been reading Hagakure, The Book of The Samurai, which is a collection of teachings originally written in the 17th century by Yamamoto Tsunetomo. Through teachings about The Way, I’ve found a deeper way to interpret the Christian Faith and better serve my God. Look it up.. it’s an excellent read. Your friends will have a large effect on what you perceive as right and wrong. Just remember: “Bad company ruins good morals.” 1 Corinthians 15:33
49. Has a sense of his own self worth. Realize that even the worst man is still, in fact, a MAN. Since the dawn of time, man has done some pretty amazing things. Make a list of everything you’re good at. If the list starts and ends with checkers, then dammit, play some checkers! Be the best checker player you can be, join a checker club, play checkers in the park.. Do whatever you can to show that you have a viable skill. After a while, you’ll realize that others wish they had your skill. (Yes, even checkers.) When you see that you have something to offer the world, you’ll start to feel self worth. If you have a kid, be there for him/her and you’ll see that they want to be with you. Being needed gives me a deeper sense of self worth.
50. Compliments me. A girl wants to know that you like them; let then know. If you stumble over your words: write them down and give them to her. If she likes to be appreciated. for editing your blog posts, do annoying things: like leave, a bunch of punctuation! errors lying around: so that she sees that you really, do, care? [Editor’s note: This paragraph was not edited! <3]
51. Will let me do things for him. Don’t underestimate her abilities. Lisa mows the lawn because she knows that I do a lot around the house. She knows that I appreciate when she puts down her girly-ness and does hard labor. (And the fact that she’s home and I’m in Iraq kinda means she has to be the one to do it!)
52. Is considerate & caring. Don’t be a douche. Women have emotions and opinions ABOUT EVERYTHING. Listen when they talk and you’ll be actively being considerate; add an opinion about what they’re talking about and you’re being caring. If she says she had a bad day, let her vent to you about it. AFTER she finishes venting, let her know that she’ll make it through whatever caused her problem and that she’ll be stronger for it. Why? Cause it’s true. The same thing applies to your life: You subconsciously know it, but you don’t tell yourself.
53. Will call me! Pick up the phone, give her a call. It takes a few seconds and tells her, “He’s thinking about me,” “He remembered,” “He cares.” It’s easy to do, doesn’t require much effort, and usually results in good things.
54. Asks for my advice, lets me ask him for advice. Women are sponges for information. Sometimes it’s as easy as relating your situation to something in their life. (Even if you know the right course of action, sometimes women want to feel needed. So take a minute and ask them, “What would you do?”) Share your knowledge; it’s the greatest gift you can give. Don’t be overbearing and constantly give your advice when not asked; sometimes people want to figure things out on their own.
55. Doesn’t have stinky farts all the time! 2 things:
56. Has faith, but not a Bible hugger. I follow God. He leads my feet and has yet to take me down the wrong path. In my personal opinion, He is for everyone. You may or may not believe in Him, but I believe He does have a plan for you. I haven’t been to a Church in about a year. (I’ve been in Iraq for about 9 months.) In my heart I know what I believe, and I’m comforted by that. Sometimes I’ll be walking and I can honestly feel Him walking beside me. I’ve been shot at, blown up, etc, multiple times, and there have been moments where I thought, “I should be dead.” Have faith in Him and he will bless your life. The Bible is a great guide and tool; I don’t read it often, but I do look to it as a source of excellent information.
57. Gives good hugs. The key to a good hug is to know the level of force to apply. It falls under METT-TC (Mission Equipment Troops Time - Terrain Civilians) which is the governing format for any Army action.
Mission - Give her a hug
Equipment - Arms
Troops - What kind of mood is she in? (sad requires gentle, excited requires firm)
Time - How long do you both have for this hug?
Terrain - Where are you? (i.e. public places, office setting)
Civilians - Who is in the area? (Parents, old people)
58. Offers to do things for me. There are easy tasks that your significant other has to do throughout her day. If you offer to take care of any of these easy tasks, she’ll see you as considerate and loving.
59. Will let me play w/his hair. If you’re bald, let her rub that shiny dome! If you have hair and get mad when it gets messed up, you’re S.O.L. Let her enjoy it a while — you might start to like it too. Letting her do stuff that annoys you but pleases her is a sacrifice. Either way, it’s not gonna kill you.
60. Let’s me see him cry/be emotional. I didn’t cry at my wedding. I didn’t cry when I held my daughter for the first time… I cried myself to sleep when my friend and former roommate was killed in action September 5th, 2007 in Balad, Iraq. Lis knows that I don’t cry; it’s just not in my nature. There are times where something affects me and I’ll let her see my emotions.. because of all the people in the world, she knows me the best and will help me through that emotion. Women have a knack for determining a good course of action to help you deal with anything that hurts you. Worst case scenario: you start to cry and she holds you close. BE FOREWARNED: if you’re too open and emotional, you run the risk of appearing weak; know when to be reserved about things and when to let her see what’s really up inside.
Until tomorrow, KZ
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